Top Chef Texas: Key Party

January 25, 2012


Previously on Top Chef:  The chefs really brought the goods (and the movie-themed product placement) in cooking a "wicked" dish for Charlize Theron. Everyone made excellent food, but they sent home Beverly anyway. Then, in Redemption Kitchen, she beat Nyseha and came closer to actually coming back.

You know how I said last week  something big was happening? Well, it involves moving my entire life thousands of miles, et al. It's a good thing. But it takes priority over this lil' ole' blog.


And it's a good thing it happens this week because ...


This week, we all fell asleep.

What happened?

• With Beverly gone, we didn't have the chefs beating up on anyone.

• Most of the six remaining chefs were unable to foresee that, having a challenge sponsored by a purportedly healthy frozen food company, they'd be asked to make healthier food than usual.

• Chris, The Rubber Band Man, was as annoying as ever and was frightened by bees.

• Grayson said "awesome" another 12 times.

• Sarah didn't want to compete against her fellow mean girl, Lindsey.

• Lindsey made better meatballs, which put Sarah The Entitled at risk.

• Sarah The Entitled felt she was nearly eliminated because she didn't know that guest judge Cat Cora doesn't care for tarragon.

• Edward was slightly less dickish this week and was happy to go up against his friend, Paul, since he wants to beat the best.

• Paul overcame his Beverly moment in the Quickfire (he missed getting a necessary ingredient on the plate by seconds) and won his umpty--umpth challenge. This means that he, of course, is guaranteed not to win the entire clam bake when this is all over.

• And Chris was finally voted off the island. (Seriously, I haven't wished someone would hold a chef down and clipper off all his hair since ... well, you know.)

And over in  ...

Redemption Kitchen

Chris arrives at the Casa Cuisine and doesn't understand Tom's letter about meeting him in "the kitchen." So, he stands around the house's kitchen talking to the bric-a-brac like someone who thinks he's funny ... but really, really, really isn't. (Well, he may be funnier than Tom tries to be, but botulism is funnier than Tom, so that's not saying much.)

Finally, when he lays off the stupid juice, he arrives in the Darkened Kitchen Of Recycled Quickfires and sees Beverly, last week's Nyseha-dethroner. We get another obligatory, "Hey, do you all still hate Beverly?" from Tom and the challenge commences. This one is another retread involving a mystery box that appears every few minutes. They'll each have to prepare a dish using each of these ingredients.

Mostly, it serves to force me to look at Horrible Heather's Horrible Mug again.

When it's all done, Beverly has the better dish and is only one chef away from re-entering the competition. 

Which should be exciting. Unless it's the next-eliminated chef who gets to come back.

In which case, it'll be as boring as this last episode.

Next time on Top Chef: The chefs will have to beg, borrow and steal ingredients from people in Central Park who will have to be their muses for the next challenge. (Did I mention I don't have the wherewithal to pay attention to things too closely this week?)